Doctor Who and  the Ewoks

Episode One
by Consumer Info knows

"Only joking, maybe someday... "

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Episode Two
by Trivial Keithy

"What do you mean only joking?" Han Solo asked his old drinking friend Lando Calrisian. "Today's the day I'm telling you."

Lando stroked his slightly bearded chin and thought. "Ok Han, but none of your crazy flying tricks."

The Millennium Falcon span as it dived into the planet's surface. Chewbacca, the co-pilot, roared in frustration as the emergency backups failed in a spectacular explosion.

"I thought you promised no fancy flying tricks?" Lando shouted at Han.

"Yeah, but nobody's perfect." Han fought the controls but the Falcon's heart just wasn't in it. "We're going to crash!"

Lando was thrown across the interior of the Falcon, landing on the sleeping figure of Leia Skywalker the daughter of Darth Vader.

"Hold tight Chewie, this is going to be bad!" Han closed his eyes as the forest rushed up at them. Chewie comforted him with a friendly roar.

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Episode Three
by Iris Wildthyme

The Doctor strolled nonchalently out of the TARDIS and stretched luxuriously, taking in a deep breath of air. Ah, that clean crisp forest smell ... he straightened up and looked around him. Not too much unlike Canada, he thought. He poked his head back through the doors and called out to his companion.

"Come on Peri, rise and shine! It's absolutely lovely out here. Green and pleasent."

Peri stuck her head out through the door. She'd heard that before. "Just what the Doctor ordered, huh?" she asked sarcastically.

"See for yourself," he beamed, tugging with undue self-satisfaction at his question-mark braces.

"Wow, very nice. When do the Daleks show up?"

The Doctor frowned with annoyance and was about to retort with a suitably pithy put-down when the sound of screeching engines filled the air and they both looked up into the sky through the thick layer of trees.

"Doctor, what is it?"

"Someone about to crashland, I think!" He took a step further away from the TARDIS.

Peri came out too, shielding her face from the sun to look up. "Where?" she shouted over the din. A look of great concern came over his face.

"Somewhere near us I'm afraid to say! Quick, back inside!"

Peri pointed upwards. "Too late!" she screamed, as a massive shape blotted out the sun ...

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Episode Four
by Trivial Keithy

Peri opened her eyes to discover that the heavy weight on her stomach was a dishy looking guy. "Hi." She said, staring at his very kissable mouth. "I'm Peri."

"Is it just me or am I dreaming?" Han Solo sat up.

"If it's a dream then we're both having it." Peri helped the injured man to his feet.

"Thanks. You haven't seen a couple of other strange people around have you? Shifty looking guy? Tall wookie, looks and smells like a week old bear corpse. Talkative girl, quite classy, strange hairdo."

The Doctor woke up and found himself confronted by an angry looking Wookie. Fortunatly he spoke their language and after an exchange of roars and groans they accepted each other's clan and cess pits.

"Hey Chewie, where's our other two friends?" Han Solo shouted over to his seven foot friend.

With a single cry. Chewbacca indicated that he had not seen Lando or Leia and that their seemed to be a distint lack of wreakage nearby. Also he could smell a campfire nearby and he was very hungry.

"Ok Chewie, lets go find our friends."

"We'll help you." Peri added, putting her arm around Han's waist. "You look like you need someone to steady you."

The Doctor followed on, throwing his beige jacket casually over his shoulder. "We're doomed." He cried in a mock Scottish accent. "Doomed ah tell ya."

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Episode Five
by Consumer Info knows

Weechoo and Frinchau, the Ewoks skipped happily through the forest. They didn't notice the figure creeping up behind them until it was too late.

"Mmmmm," said the Doctor, the picnic smells good this year, our furry friends have excelled themselves. He walked into a clearing and then turned round slowly, a grave expression on his face. "I think you'd better look at this..."

"It's like they died of Fire..." Peri looked at the dead Ewoks sadly.

"Who could have done this" Leia screamed, "Why? they were sooo young!"

"I think we should tell Wicket," Said Han gravely. "I've got a feeling these aren't the first or the last murders."

They hurried towards the village. On the way they noticed a plume of smoke. "The South tower!" said Leia.

They all hurried towards the site, which wasn't pretty.

"Looks like high explosives" Said the Doctor.

Bodies of the tower staff were littered everywhere, mixed amongst the rubble. They had been fired out of the exploding tower like bullets from a gun.

"If I could see the person who did this..." Lando trailed off, his hand firmly on his blaster.

"You might get your chance then!" said the Doctor.

They all looked towards the edge of the forest, as Peri and Chewie began to scream.

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Episode Six
by Trivial Keithy

"If I could see the person who did this..." Lando trailed off, his hand firmly on his blaster.

"You might get your chance then!" said the Doctor.

They all looked towards the edge of the forest, as Peri and Chewie began to scream.

Five squads of Chelonian Warriors rushed into the clearing.

Commander Yillox looked disgusted at the humans. "Fire on my command."

Peri screamed again until Leia slapped her.

"Get a grip will you?" She demanded before taking a rather large gun out of her skimpy costume. "Fire at MY command." She commanded.

This was odd, very odd. Were humans really this stupid or was it planning something. Either way Yillox couldn't afford to make a mistake. "Fire!" He ordered just as a rain of stones came out of the trees on all sides at them.

"Run!" Han commanded. "The little guys are fighting back." He dragged Peri behind him because she just stood there in shock.

Lando waited for Chewy, Leia and the Doctor to get behind the flimsy cover of a fallen tree trunk before firing a few shots at the strange turtle-like creatures.

"Eewicwa eecha ooeccka." Wicket explained to his friends.

"He says that the hard shells, the Chelonians, have all been vanquished for their evilness." The Doctor translated for the Ewoks.

"Hey these guys are cute." Peri cuddled a young Ewok who sat on her lap. "Why can't we meet more aliens like the Ewoks instead of Daleks and Ice Warriors and the Master, ick." She shuddered at the times he had tried to kill her.

"You just need to look a little harder and with open eyes." The Doctor advised the young American botany student before tickling the baby Ewok under its chin and it threw up on Peri's knees.

The End

